The Magic of You

An unspoken bond
A gentle smile, a loving touch
A whispered breath
A guiding hand, a tender kiss
A love so pure, so sacred
A reverence
A comforting presence
To soothe and to calm
Pacify and hope
To endure and experience
Revel and rejoice
To hurt yet not give up
Stumble yet not fall
To understand but not demand
Rectify but not criticize
To express but not impose
Accept but not judge
And to love but not conditionally.

A sense of security, of belonging
An experience of immense peace
The end of a lonely search
The beginning of a new journey
Of friendship, trust and togetherness
An exploration of myself
And of you
You make this journey ever more so beautiful
Such is the magic of what we have together.

You give meaning to my words,
A purpose to my convictions
You give strength to my beliefs,
And hope to my dreams.
You give courage to my endeavors,
And understanding to my failures
You give me the wings to fly
To soar to new heights
Yet keep me grounded at the same time

And as we delve deeper into this labyrinth of love
Each day, I know you a little more
Each day, I love you a little more
And in doing so love myself
For you make me what I’ve always wanted to be…

You my love, make my life worthy of living
Each day my faith in you grows stronger
Each day my faith in life grows stronger

Such is the magic of what we have together.
Such is the magic of YOU

Love is so Ephemeral

Love is so ephemeral and forgetting takes so long
It’s not like you were not around, you hardly cared
Not like we rarely talked, you barely listened
Not even that the spark had gone, the love went out of your eyes
Don’t know which was harder, you were there but yet so far

I could feel your hand holding mine;
And yet our hearts felt so far apart.
I could feel the lingering touch;
But your coldness chilled my heart.
I could see you smile;
But your impatience stilled my joy.
I reached out to you at night
But your indifference cut me a thousand times over

Couldn’t take the pain no more
Couldn’t be your life’s very high second priority no more
So I set you free my love, & though in my heart I knew it was over
I had hoped that you would come back to me

Time has passed by, and I still remember every touch, every sigh
But now I can no longer be content with the memories
They mock at me, pricking my heart
Love is so ephemeral and forgetting takes so long...

Smothered by the intensity, dazed by the pain
Embittered by the twist of fate, scarred by the betrayal
I trudge along nursing my bruised heart
For you did not even spare my pride
I gave you my world but you shattered my dreams

I laugh back at the naïve girl who
In the foolishness of hope, believed you really loved her
Now time has passed and though people may come and go
I know better than to trust life again
The walls I’ve built around myself are high
With a promise – no one shall ever be able to hurt me again

And yet in the wee hours of the morn
As I lie awake and will for sleep to come
I think of you and what could have been
And the tears that come unbidden
Unleash the tide of ache and loss
Love is so ephemeral and forgetting takes so long...

Nothingness...

A stirring glance, a lingering caress, the tender kiss
A sliver of hope, a whiff of madness, the whispered promise
A glimmer of a chance…

A swirl of memories, a puff of smoke, the reek of insanity
A yellowed page, burnt around the edges, the harsh reality
A dilapidated lifetime….

Shards of feelings, broken promises, the brilliant lies
A knick here, a scratch there, and the redness
A bleeding heart…

Bleeding…seeping…helpless with pain
Searching…aching… crawling in vain

And then the surreptitious friend beckons
Restless no more, enveloped in white, lulled into silence
Silence of the heart, the mind and the soul.

Numbed by the nothingness,
I am peaceful at last.

My Reality

I wanted to share
Loneliness was all I found
I needed reassurance
Mockery was all I got
I craved appreciation
There was only contempt and derision
I trusted
The betrayal destroyed my faith
I expected
There was only disappointment
I loved
But that was perceived as my weakness
I was scared
There was no hand to hold mine
I wept
There was no one to wipe my silent tears
My illusions were shattered, for better or for worse
Too much pain, too much of myself at stake
Too much that time cannot heal
So I hide behind a mask
The walls I’ve built around myself are high
For it is fear, I fear.
Of being unloved,
Not cherished, unworthy;
Of being rejected,
Of being alone, yet again.
No.
Not again, Never again
My calm and confident
Façade is a farce
My nonchalance, my laughter;
For you can never see the tears lurking behind
The sadness that seems to tear at my very soul
The real ‘me’ lies inside –
Trapped, restless, unsure,
Lonely, scared, trembling;
Yet I carry on as normally as possible
And if it hadn’t been for this
You’d have never known

You are my Shore

This restlessness inside of me
Can only be stilled by your calm
This confusion can only be soothed in your arms…

These tumultuous thoughts
Like crashing waves, raging in the storm
Angry and relentless, foolish and fearless
Blinded at times by their own arrogance.
The waves surge ahead, proud and tall
Only to break at the shore;
Their pride shattered, haughtiness lost in the patterns of sands
Their existence destroyed into a zillion miniscule particles

You would think that the shore would gloat
And stand taller than the tall..
But yet the shore just gathers the waves in its arms
Soothing gentle and forgiving strength
And gives them back their meaning; their very existence
And, no, not even the bruises show - as they ride back again
Their spirit restored; renewed and reawakened
Strong enough to wager back to the turbulent seas again
Secure and warm in the knowledge of those waiting arms
Patient and strong; their safest harbor

I may head out into the open seas again, I may go and crash again
But I know that every time when I break, I will have you as my shore